Christmas is over. But I still feel like celebrating.

Hi folks! Did you ever get off of a rollercoaster and run through the crowd to get in line again? And you stand there waiting anxiously to ride again? That’s what I’m going through with Christmas. Not because I want to eat, drink and be merry, but, because I want the feeling to last for ever.

Too often people are harried and hurried and simply just are jerks about everything. But when Christmas rolls around a sense of duty infects everyone and they feel that they must not complain. That no matter how difficult the crowds, how slow the highways, how selfish the shoppers can be, all will be okay because there is love in the air.

Every year the tree stays up till way past January. Last year we had it up until somewhere around Valentine’s Day. Sure, we may be kooky, but the sense of goodwill remained. That tree gave us a sense of hope.

If we couldn’t find peace and understanding out in the crazy world, then, by gholly, we would find it at home.

This begs the question, “Why?” Why can’t everyday be just like Christmas? (Sorry Elvis, had to do it). Why on earth do we go through life bitching and moaning and cheating and stealing and being selfish? Why are the folks running this world running it into the ground? Don’t they see that their greed is hurting us all? Can’t they tell that their corporatism is destroying the earth?

I just read something today that stated that the richest people in the world just got 7 trillion dollars richer in 2017 – and that’s not enough for them! They want more so they are buying political favors.

I know this has been going on for centuries. But, please, can someone tell me why aren’t we fighting back as a society? In huge numbers? Why is it there can be a million-man march on the National Mall in Washington and two decades later we are still gunning down blacks like it was some sort of rite of passage? Why can’t we get two million blacks, whites, latinos and asians to march on Washington to voice their opposition to corruption in politics and corporate spending? What do the Bilderbergers know about us that we don’t know?

There may well come a day when people from all walks of life, from all over the globe, stand together in protest to the ruling class. But that day won’t happen if we allow idiots to vote in celebrities to run the country. And that goes all the way back to George Washington. We’ve got to do better at picking our leaders. We have to do better at researching their credentials and their claims.

We have to TAKE back our FREEDOM.

 

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Merry Christmas to All

I just want to thank all of you for being so understanding and not turning away from me. Bipolar is a mean menchen and it had me in its grips for quite a while. I don’t know how the depression got so bad because I didn’t do anything different, I was taking my meds regularly and I have people close by who truly love me. I had it all. Then that big black dog of depression decided to wake up and stir up some trouble. Thank goodness for science! Without people experimenting all the time and so many people volunteering to be lab rats I would have gone out of my mind by now.

Good news! I am starting a freelancing business. For the new year I only want 1 customer. If that happens this will have been a success. I am focusing on writing and editing and proofreading people’s literary works. Wish me luck. 🙂

If you can, come visit my website. That would be really cool. It’s at The Inkwell

Let me know what you think. Thanks

So Christmas will be good this year. There will be presents to open and a turkey to roast. At this time of year I really get to thinking about all the folks who don’t have homes, or families, or food and shoes and friends to talk to. As good as it is for most of us, it is heartbreaking and heartwrenching for many others. This holiday season please take a moment to give to a homeless person. I know they are not the cleanest folks around but they truly are nice people and many of them will smile and in their own way thank you for your kindness.

Many of them are addicted to alcohol or drugs and many are also veterans who were willing to die for you. Give them that respect. Be thankful that it isn’t you on the streets begging for food or money. I’ve been there. In many ways I still am.

Be the change you want to see in the world.

Anti-depressants WORK!

So, it’s been a LONG while since I’ve felt able to function – and – to write something worthwhile.

Thanks to my psydoc for being aggressive. First, and foremost, he has prescribed me some antidepressants. The first pills didn’t work. I got a bad rash all over my body. I think it was called Sertraline. (My memory is still full of holes) I don’t remember the brand name. Maybe Zoloft or Prozac. Anyhow, it was not the right pill for me, so we next went with Tegretol (Carbamazapine) 200mg. It has been a great change. I have some reason to live.
prescription-drugs

Not only has my attitude changed, but, I feel like I can be a member of society again. I still don’t think I can work a regular 9 to 5, my brain and my outbursts won’t allow for it, but I CAN work for myself and so I have started freelancing. More on that later. Back to the meds.

My psydoc, on our first visit, said he wanted to get me off of the Lithium because I have been on it for 10 years, and, with prolonged use is a high risk of damage to the kidneys or liver. I think the kidneys. Either way, the risk is too great to continue with the lithium so we have been weaning me off of it.

It would have been fine if we had something to replace it with. Weaning me off has led to violent outbursts and I have lost my relationship with the therapist. She was too scared of me and she doesn’t want to see my anymore. Ce la vie.

So, I am again without a therapist. Flying solo here. But that doesn’t bother me so much. I’m a loner and an independent person anyway. But I need those pills. Can’t live without them.

Now, I’m confused. I don’t know whether the Tegretol is the anti-depressant or if the Fluoxetine is the antidepressant. I’m taking them both. I think the Tegretol is to replace the Lithium. Anyhow, I am down to only 450mg of lithium (half of what I was taking at 900mg). Like I said, it has not been without incident.

I almost lost my relationship with my psydoc as well. He got an earful of my rage and he was unprepared for it and threatened to throw me to the curb. And yet, it was his fault that my rage was so prevalent because he failed to replace the lithium and left me (and everybody else) vulnerable to the rage within me. But, good fortune was on my side and he understood where I was coming from. So we are still working together. Whew!

So, now I have a website. The Inkwell — There I am farming out my services to anyone who needs helps with writing, editing, and/or proofreading. It has been a real challenge to put up the webiste, and, it was a lot of fun coding the adjusting. I still have a few things to do with it, mostly links and blog posts to do, but it is up and running. Yay!

If y’all don’t mind, I’d like to link to the site every now and again and show you what is going on.

I tell you, those anti-depressants have really changed my life. If you or someone you know suffers from Bipolar and they are not on anti-depressants, talk to the psydoc and see if that path might be helpful.  It’s a WORLD of difference!

So anyhow, it is nice to be back and I trust that I will be active again. I’m looking forward to seeing everyone’s stories.

Peace